a first

So tonight I decided I needed some Keri Christmas time which basically meant time alone. It has been a roller coaster month. I have had great happiness and peace as well as painful sadness. Most people do not know and would not expect that my husband loved this time of the year. He got excited to go pick out our Christmas tree every year. He even went and cut one down once when we were pretty broke and did not think we were going to be able to afford one. It came complete with an empty bird's nest. There are certain ornaments that were/are his and he loved hanging them and picking out wrapping paper. I will always cherish the huge smile on his face when he would hand me the gift he had for me. He always seemed so happy to see me open it and waited for my reaction. It is so extremely hard to realize that we can't do these things together any more but I am so extremely grateful that we did get the opportunity to share these moments with each other and that they are a part of who I am. They give me peace, comfort and strength. The best Christmas gift is love. Sharing that with someone, giving it and receiving it is something that makes life worth living and it does not have a monetary price tag. There are no crowds of shoppers to contend with. This gift settles into our hearts and souls and lasts beyond our physical bodies. I am so in love with my husband and thank him everyday for being a part of my life and allowing me to be a part of his. This is my first Christmas without him physically and I am going to do my best to open that everlasting gift of love tomorrow and have a joyful day. I wish the same for you!