faith

I received a card 2 weeks ago that I love because it did not have the word sympathy on the front of it. It said "What a beautiful difference one single life made." It is from our therapist whom we love and who knows us very well. I keep this card next to a photo of Paul.
It is true Paul made a beautiful difference in this world. He did it for me, friends, family and strangers and in that I find comfort. He lives on as the cloud does in the rain. Because he was so he shall always be. We are connected in this world in reality and we do not just cease to be. When I talk about my red bird I am serious. Paul is that bird singing to me just as I am a being seeing the bird and hearing him sing. The circle of life does not stop. With this belief I find peace and comfort. I also have a deep respect for all life. I was raised to have this respect. It is part of who I am.
There have been times when Paul would call me out on this. The most recent was over black ants that found refuge in my kitchen a few months ago. We do everything possible in this house not to kill anything unless we have too. The ants were out of control. I felt I had no choice. The little buggers are hard to catch & release. So I just finally started killing them. Paul saw me doing this and heard me complaing about them and stood next to me and said I guess we all need a home and something to eat. I stopped and looked at him kind of annoyed because how do I get rid of them the right way and pretty proud of him and happy that he said that to me.
Imagine...we all have an impact on each other and the world in which we live...in this way we are one with each other. The possibilities that exist in this belief are amazing and bring peace. I am grateful for this insight, for Paul & I being part of each other's lives and for the connections I have realized.