Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Lesson learned..again

Today I learned a very important lesson. It is one I already know which makes it even more significant. Even when we know things it is easy for us to "forget" or leave this knowledge behind. I awoke with a headache this morning. I went to bed with one last night. In fact I have had one for a few days. I was attributing it to hormonal and weather changes. Now if you know my medical history you know that for me headaches are not something to mess around with. I was kind of freaked out about this but kind of not too. I know my different kinds of headaches and recognize these as tension possibly sinus headaches. This makes sense. My life has been turned upside down and inside out in the last 3 months well, really, 3 years and at this time of the year in the midwest it can be 50 degrees one day and 90 the next. I like to believe that I have all the tools to relax and keep myself from being stressed out. Paul & I studied Jin Shin Jyutsu, meditation & T'ai Chi as well as many other things to attain balance, relaxation, good energy flow and self care. I do have the tools but I have not been using them. Paul's passing was so unexpected and unbelievable to me that I have allowed myself to stray a bit from what I know. I acknowledge the loss in my life and I am trying to move forward but in so doing I have come into situations that only add to the stress even though they are my ways out of it in the big picture. Going through bankruptcy is one of those things. My lawyer is great and I really like and trust her but it is a crazy thing to have to do. I don't regret doing it. I had to. I will be glad when it is over soon. Also going through our things or his things and deciding what to keep, sell, get rid of is tough emotionally. Even though these are just things they carry attached meaning. That process took it out of me. I stay up later than I was used to over the last few years and throwing off sleep patterns is not a good thing to do physically. It throws our organs off and they need a break from the day. I am drinking less water and more tea. Tea is ok but it has caffeine and that triggers headaches plus lack of water causes dehydration which triggers headaches. I try planning what to do on this day or that and well that does not work for me either. I have tried to learn to just walk with myself and the Buddha inside me. This morning I was reading a bit about tension headaches and that is most definitely what I have been getting. According to my reading more than 70% of all headaches are this type. The easiest effective treatment is relaxation. So I remembered a few physical therapy exercises to stretch those neck muscles and did those along with some Jin Shin and breathing, rubbed some Tiger Balm on my forehead and neck and laid down for a few hours and feel better. One of my furkids (cats) was sleeping with me and I watched him thinking I have alot to learn from my furkids. They just sleep when they need it. Anyone or anything can be a teacher. My point is that these are all things I know and have chosen to "forget" recently. Life situations give us great big reasons to neglect our well being but they we can not allow them to be excuses for it. Paul would be kicking my butt for this. So from now on I walk with the Buddha, my cats and myself in order to be healthy and rested instead of stressed and tired with big dark circles and a throbbing head. What is your life lesson this week?

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