Sunday, July 25, 2010


I had an amazing & inspiring writing class today. so of course I am going to share some of my prose from the class. It is a class facilitated by the Poet Laureate of Kansas Caryn Mirriam- Goldberg through Turning Point:The Center for Hope and Healing. The class contains people on a journey with serious illness and their supporters.

These 2 were based on a magic moments

Your music played on the stereo
Pictures of you at various ages and stages
moved like a slide show across three screens.
People stood up and told stories about you
and spoke about how you touched their lives.
I am not sure you knew those things.
Reconnections were made.
People, friends who played music together 10-15 years ago
saw each other and remembered.

I saw more smiles and heard more laughter than tears and crying.
That was magic honey, your magic.
I only wish it would have happened before you physically left us but
I know you were there at your celebration and you experienced it.
That night gave me comfort and peace. I cried but
not necessarily sad tears. Your magic worked on everyone that night.

My Red Bird

I looked up to the sky
the morning you passed
and asked you to let me know it was ok,
that you were ok. The red bird that always
appeared in the yard when I was having a bad day
landed on the McGuffin's roof next door and
started singing away. When he stopped I went inside but
felt drawn back out and that little
red bird flew right back to the roof and serenaded me again.
I know you are my red bird, you owed me a song.
We talked about that in the hospital and you gave
Me one that morning. You have appeared to me everyday since then.
My magical bird- my free husband's soul.

Just have to tell ya my red bird is outside right now singing away:}

This next one is on Freedom. I referenced pieces of one of my prose works from the book My Tree Called Life.

We never did let our illnesses define us
or how we would live.
Some might say I was the food police but
in our dietary changes our bodies found freedom.
In our suffering, worry, and fear, the great unknown
we found freedom. We found deep, intense love on all kinds
of levels, happiness and joy to just be waking up
Our open minds and belief in ourselves gave us freedom to take control
and responsibility for our lives and to have fun and be goofy in public.
You did not have to go to a job you hated anymore and you wrote
music all day as it was meant to be. We could go to the park
instead of doing chores, take trips and buy the motorcycle
instead of worrying about how much was in the savings account.
Cancer and brain abcess did give us freedom to enjoy each moment
in the present as we wanted and needed to.
Your passing gave you freedom from a body full of cancer and
failing organs. It allows you to soar and take care of me in a divine way
and it allows me the freedom to paint my own masterpiece.
I have to do some fancy brushstrokes because
I had already painted one for both of us.
I don't want to give cancer any credit
for anything but I cannot deny the freedom it gave us
to find our purpose and live like we mean it.

This one is prompted by one of Paul's poems in the book My tree Called Life

"Let life unfold and reveal
to me the how
and let me not get in the way"
You did this with beauty and grace
It was an honor to bask in the
revelations with you
as your partner. Now I must
do the same. It is easy for me to get
in my own way because of the sadness and pain
and the fact that at 37 I am a widow,
a label I reject. Also all of the crappy
business kind of stuff I have to do.
I do not dwell in these things.
I dwell in the possibilities and experiences yet to come.
You are an inspiration, a teacher and a rockstar in these ways.
You are my how and I never doubted you. I am ready for the rest of
my life to unfold with beautiful, loud, guitar driven music
all around me.


  1. so beautiful!! your writings today were so inspiring! i enjoyed listening to them so much

  2. I remember the heat in august
    Standing in the driveway looking west
    The gravel and the dust rising slightly
    The trees in the background glowing like a golden frame
    My friend Paul standing alone
    "I'll see you soon brother!"
    His hair was gold
    The sun reflecting all around him
    I cannot see him through the setting sun
    Something special in that moment
    "Hey call me Paul, ok?"

  3. These are beautiful and made me cry. But in a good way.